That right there, that is the colic carry. Just one of the many, many things we tried when Boog was in the midst of his colicky first 3 months. You see how well that worked.
The New Girl has been battling with a colicky infant for four and a half months now and although Boogie never had it as bad as she describes, my heart truly goes out to her. Boogie had colic starting about 3 or so weeks until around 11 weeks old, with the worst being right there at about 5-6 weeks. Pretty textbook actually.
He didn’t cry nonstop but from about 9pm until around 11pm or as late as 1pm there was really nothing that could be done for him. Typically the husband and I would take turns in 20 minute intervals. There would be bouncing and patting and shooshing. Swaddling and swinging and holding pacifiers in the tiny screaming mouth. There would be breastfeeding and bottle feeding, Zantac and even onion juice. Anything and everything was tried and most of the time you just had to ride it out.
I spent many nights laying on the couch holding a paci in his mouth waiting for him to fall asleep. After he did I dared not move him. This resulted in weeks of me sleeping on the couch with him on me tucked into the crook of my arm resting against the back of the couch. We’d sleep like that until he woke up or my back couldn’t take it anymore and then, after eating, he would allow me to place him in his bed for another 3-4 hour stretch.
There were several times when one or the both of us would simply have to put him down and get some air. I truly believe that is the key in surviving an infant with any degree of colic. People always said this to me when I was pregnant and I didn’t get it. How could you just walk away from your screaming baby? I don’t think it was possible for me to understand until facing that situation.
As a parent, it is heart wrenching to hear your brand new baby wail and feel helpless to be able to fix it. All you can do is just wait it out and do what you can to maintain some sense of sanity. The New Girl talks about how before she couldn’t imagine how someone could shake or smack a baby and neither could I. But, as I looked at my son wailing and red-faced for what seemed like the millionth night in a row I totally understood how you could just snap and want it to stop. That’s when you lay them down and there is no shame in that at all.
What I don’t get about colic is the stigma it seems to carry with some parents. I have several friends that most definitely had colicky babies but if you ask them they’ll say “oh, no he/she was just a little fussy.” For me I was glad for the diagnosis of colic. It meant I wasn’t doing something wrong. It meant there was an explanation for all the crying and that eventually it would stop. It didn’t mean that Boogie was in some way flawed or that I was a bad parent.
I feel relatively lucky in that Boog wasn’t that bad as far as colic goes, but I think that comes with reflection. I also feel a modicum of guilt as well. Although I put him down several times when I felt close to the edge, I made a practice of patting his swaddled bottom in an attempt to soothe him and I suspect there were several times when the patting was much too vigorous. Ah well I’ll let that begin my list of things I feel guilty about when it comes to parenting my child. The first of many I’m sure.
October 24, 2007 at 9:10 pm |
I had two colicky babies. TWO. COLICKY. BABIES. I also didn’t understand how someone could hurt a child, there was more than one occasion where I’d have to put down my son and go outside to get away from the crying. My pediatrician was of no help with my son, telling me that “some babies just cry.” By the time my daughter was born, my pediatrician had had a colicky baby of her own. Amazing how much more helpful she was the second time.
I figure if I have more I’m immune from colic! Right?!